Author: Abigail G. Manning

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Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Our Voices Matter: I experienced Domestic Violence, the awful aftermath including PTS and the arduous climb out of the deep, dark pit so I could stand strong on the solid ground of Authentic Health. Creating awareness on all forms of abuse, including DV, is so important to me because I care about people and want healthy lives for us all!

Being scared but knowing my voice matters and is helpful to others, a year ago I publicly told my story for the first time. With the attitude of “go big or go home” I shared it with over 300 people as the keynote speaker at The Crisis Center’s Gala.

October is Domestic Violence awareness month. Please consider how you can help create awareness, prevention and ending the cycles of abuse. Here are some ideas:

* Donate TIME or MONEY to a Crisis Center/Shelter and other organizations who focus on health and well-being.

* Be a SAFE PERSON for others to openly share their relationship concerns and problems. Being safe means you are not judgemental or finger-pointing or disbelieving their experiences. You don’t have to have the answers. You just need an open ear and a kind heart. Feeling alone and afraid of other’s negative opinion/ judgment are the top reasons why the abused don’t reach out and get the support they need and deserve. Consider this…strong people don’t like appearing or feeling weak. Insecure people can’t risk hearing “you should have” statements because they are already beating themselves up. Please make it safe for all personality types to confide in you.

* Be BRAVE. Share your hurt, abuse, hardships with someone you trust. Trust is key and built over time with shared experiences that you work hard to secure and safeguard. I teach that trust in our relationships is where there is mutual: Truth. Respect. Unity. Safety. Transparency.

* Find RESOURCES and gather KNOWLEDGE on the warning signs. DV is a clear cycle that experts can identify. Abusers are predators who look for easy prey. None of us ever think we are easy prey, however we all can be preyed upon. We all have our own definitions of what’s accepted as “normal” based on our life experiences and influenced by our wounds and insecurities. We need to heal and address those issues so we can move into the security of being Authentically Healthy and protect ourselves and those around us.

Your voice and life experiences truly do matter! You deserve to be healthy and happy!

I care about you and want to be of support to you and those you care about. My workshops, speaking events and coaching explain how to identify and pro-actively become our best-safest-happiest selves. For more information or to bring our programs to your work/life, please contact me.
https://abigailgmanning.com/

ENLIGHTEN. EMPOWER. END.

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Newest Podcast on: Triggers, Boundaries & Authentic Health

Mike Domitrz is a leading national authority on dating safety having dedicated himself to teaching others about sexual assault, sexual abuse and related topics through his Date Safe Project. This podcast is my second guest appearance with him and this time we’re talking about Triggers, Healthy Boundary Lines and how to secure and safeguard Authentic Health.  I would love to hear your feedback!

Also, please share your answers to my questions in this podcast of  “Is this going to propel me forward to the vision I have for my life? Is this going to make me a better person tomorrow than I am today or is this unhealthy?”

I care about you! Please reach out and let me know how you are doing as well as what type of information would best help and be of service to you.

Click below to listen in on the conversation! 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/15-abigail-manning-on-triggers-boundaries-authentic/id1403629612?i=1000419558802&mt=2

You like to read more than listen?! No problem! Here is the transcript (with some typos but you get the gist of the conversation!)

*LINKS*
https://abigailgmanning.com
https://www.facebook.com/abigailgmanning
https://twitter.com/AbigailGManning

Continue reading Newest Podcast on: Triggers, Boundaries & Authentic Health

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Summit Time!

MEET ME AT THE SUMMIT! I’m delighted to be one of 45 speakers sharing our insights, research and empowering tips to make this a better world. The summit is to help everyone with Emotional Abuse Recovery and Resilience. Monday, September 3rd my interview airs. “Finger-pointing: No Room for Blame or Shame When Building Authentic Health”

Starting 9/1, all interviews are FREE daily when aired. Permanent All-Access Pass purchased by 9/2 is $197 and increases to $397.

Click the link below to take advantage of this amazing savings and powerful information!

https://www.lifestorylaboratory.com/a/9260/Mdi34apj

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Stand Up & Say Something

Have you tried stand up paddle boarding? I’ve done it on small lakes, a large ocean and even through some Colorado river rapids…that got my heart beating fast! The acronym for stand up paddle boarding is SUP, which is about as straightforward of a name as you can get! You literally stand up on the board and navigate on the water by using a long handled paddle. You need to be aware of what’s around you because trust me, you don’t want to fall into Lake Dillion where the water is 46 degrees by the warmest part of summer. Brrr! However, with very little instruction, I’m confident everyone can stand up and feel the rush of self-empowerment as you glide over the water.

Why don’t we stand up more often in other parts of our life? For example, when we are in an unhealthy friendship or see a friend in a rocky romantic relationship, why don’t we stand up and say something? As a SHINE Girl community, you have created a strong tribe by sticking together and protecting each other. So, why are there still unhealthy situations in teen dating and relationships? I think it is because we haven’t had enough instruction to “SUP” and once we do, all of us can all stand up for ourselves and each other.

In the world of relationships, SUP stands for:

Safety. Unity. Personal Responsibility.

Safety starts with recognizing what is unhealthy or abusive behavior. To make it easier to understand and recognize, I describe it as “Repeated mistreatment, where one person uses manipulations to gain and maintain power and control over another person.” These are the dangerous rapids we have to recognize so we can successfully navigate and avoid them. Rapids can look like one person treating the other with:  Continue reading Stand Up & Say Something

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I Don’t Like Work

I love chatting with people to get their perspectives on life. Recently one comment by a colleague surprised me when he said “You shouldn’t use the word work because it will deter and discourage people from trying.” (You shouldn’t….always a winner of a way to start a conversation…not!) When asked why, he replied “I don’t like the word work because work is just too hard.” 
 
It has my gears turning. We all get caught up on words and our individual interpretation of them based on our life experiences. Work for him meant drudgery, oppression, being bossed around, and something to be avoided. I could only imagine how many times he sabotaged his own success by having a mental block about the word work. As a kid when he heard “do your homework” his walls instantly went up. As a budding pianist he was told it will take a lot of hard work and practice so he eventually quit playing. Throughout his adult life, he dreaded five days a week of putting on a suit to go to work or in his mind, the dungeon. For him, work is a dirty word. 
 
Work for me has a very different interpretation. I was raised by two parents whose strong message was no matter what you do, you’ll never be good enough or worthy of my love. Being an optimist I knew this couldn’t be true. There had to be some threshold of where I cleared the highest of bars and won their love, or even their approval, or if neither of those, at least they would stop their ridicule of me. 
 
Work has always been my fighting survival skill and emotional protection to say…maybe I’m not there yet but I’m going to be! A little relentless voice that says…I got a whole bunch of good stuff inside of me just waiting for the right opportunity for it to come jumping out. For me, work is a hope-filled word. 
Work results provided the internal, positive cheering for myself as I overcame exterior, negative brainwashing. 
 
As an athletic kid, I knew how great it felt to stand on the podium. I started gymnastics at age three. With both joy for the sport and a commitment to be the best gymnast I could be, I conditioned, stretched, practiced and dedicated myself. That meant I woke up early and went into the cold, dark Chicago winter mornings to run so I would have extra endurance. I wasn’t a state champion but I saw how my diligent work and big effort paid off by teaching me a life lesson that I have ability to create a better tomorrow than today.
Because I was a forthright kid who often stood up to protect my sisters when my parents were being harsh, I learned speaking truth is more important than suffering silently. I worked at my speaking skills, earning a double major in Communications and I now speak up for other abused, neglected, bullied and poorly treated kids and adults. I won’t ever get my parents love or approval, but it’s a magical feeling to hear how my voice has positively changed someone’s life. My heart overflows when I hear their commitment to work on how they think about themselves, how they allow people to treat them, and how they are going protect themselves and others. Call me a sap but that makes my eyes water every time! For me, that’s love in action. The hard work I do to create awareness on what is Authentic Health so together we can prevent and end all forms of abuse…is well worth it.
 
I don’t like work, I love it!
 
ENLIGHTEN. EMPOWER. END.
Please contact us for workshops, training, speaking and coaching.
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Declaration Beats Achievement

As a country, we celebrate our independence on the day we DECLARED it and not on the day we ACHIEVED it. I find our history intriguing and very telling of the power of unified commitment and uncompromised conviction. It says a lot to me about the spirit of our ancestors and what lies in our own DNA.

The background story is on July 2, 1776, the Continental Congress voted in favor of the Declaration of Independence and the historic document drafted by Thomas Jefferson was adopted on July 4th. It wasn’t until seven, hard, cold, costly years later, on September 3, 1783, that we signed the Treaty that gave us our independence from Britain. We were clearly the underdogs and absolutely inferior from a military perspective but there was a driving force uniting individuals, leaders and communities to band together to face their adversity and stand up for what they believed was right.

With every written word in the Declaration of Independence, they let the world know…freedom is our united truth. With every action they took, they demonstrated they would face any risk, overcome any fear and get around any obstacle, in order to achieve their vision of freedom.

Maybe the key to obtaining Authentic Health is backwards to how we normally approach problems. What if we STARTED with celebrating a shared declaration that each person deserves to be healthy and happy. Then with insights and support of our families, communities and co-workers, we buckle down and do the hard, often scary and challenging work it takes to remove the unhealthy words, actions and behaviors so we all can reach our best-self vision.

When we claim our independence from unhealthy and toxic people, we are no longer inter-dependent on them and we are free to have power and control of our lives.

When you make a declaration of freedom from abusive, traumatic, harassing, bullying and other unhealthy behaviors in yourself and others, like our ancestors, you change not only your life but the lives of generations to come…and that’s something to celebrate!

Happy 4th!

Enlighten. Empower. End.